A coaching client said to me this week, “I make a decent salary, I live in a nice house, and my car is only four years old, nevertheless, when I compare what I have to others, particularly those more fortunate than I, I begin to feel unhappy and frustrated. This especially comes up when I see no apparent difference between me and the other person.”
Ahhhh…yes…I can relate, can’t you? I too have gotten sucked into that feeling.
At an Al-Anon meeting I attended someone said it was called “COMPARE AND DESPAIR” syndrome! Sums it up quite well! In the age of Facebook we now have Facebook envy.
So the question is: Is striving to HAVE MORE in direct opposition with BEING GRATEFUL?
My opinion is that it depends on WHERE the striving to have more comes from…
Is it a grasping, gotta have it feeling?
Is it a fleeing, can’t stand it feeling?
Is it a retribution, I’ll show them, come hell or high water feeling?
Is it a quick fix, I gotta feel SOMETHING feeling?
Is it in a heart opening, I have got to show the world my true self feeling?
Is it a craving to contribute, to serve in a higher way feeling?
Is it in a burning, I’ve got to be free feeling?
Is in a passionate, I’ve got to live my true authentic self feeling?
YOU SEE WHAT I’M GETTING AT? It all comes down to the SOURCE of the movement. I believe that gratitude can cohabitate with wanting more when it comes from the place of living your true authentic self.
When you set your sights on the babe, the boat or the bucks, you rarely get a long lasting TRUE happiness. That is what has happened to our society. The GRASPING to have MORE has sucked the SOUL out of us.
However, when you are striving to live your life from your true authentic self…to DO better…to SHARE more…to SERVE joyously…that can certainly coexist with gratitude. When feelings and action are heart centered, nothing can go wrong! And when you are being MORE of who you are...you are most likely a lot more GRATEFUL!
let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray. -Rumi
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